


If I ain't got you

by MarieRuby



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Awkwardness, Established Relationship, Fluff, Gen, Kissing, M/M, Making Out, Roommates, Sexual Frustration, Simon is a nerd, alec has blue balls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-11
Updated: 2016-10-11
Packaged: 2018-08-21 19:19:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8257402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarieRuby/pseuds/MarieRuby
Summary: "I will kill him. I swear to god i’ll kill him.” Alec doesn’t even blink and Simon totally believes the threat is real. Blue balls are a powerful thing. 
or
simon accidentally cockblocks his new roommate





	

**Author's Note:**

> Its the 4th time i try to post this, work with me ao3.  
> no beta.  
> enjoy  
> xx

 

Simon was living with Magnus. Yep, totally a thing that was happening, him, a Vampire, was cohabiting a loft with a centuries year old warlock, that could or could not be some sort of prince of hell. It was an improvement considering his last place of residence was full of people that dedicated themselves with killing downworlders. It was mostly cool, he was now a creature of the night and Magnus was gone during the day. They barely saw each other, and when they were both home Simon tried to keep it to himself.

Which doesn’t mean that, when he is suddenly awake by the noise of something falling and the sound of a body thumping on the floor he doesn't get up in vampire speed and finds out what’s happening. With the rise of Valentine, Jace gone and crazy circle members around, there’s never too careful (he’s also low-key scared of Rafael staking him. Sue him).

It really shouldn’t be a surprise, when entering the living room in his giraffe pajamas, he spots Magnus straddling Alec on the floor, his shirt discarded and hands touching everywhere. Like, he can see Alec’s hand slipping inside Magnus sweatpants, and their kissing is so filthy it deserves a parental warning.

But oh boy,it is a BIG surprise (damn he can see what they were packing, kind of impressive) and he does the only reasonable thing in this situation: yelping and covering his eyes. Because he doesn't need to see live porn involving his roommate and a guy that kind of wants to kill him already.

  
“What…” Alec stops kissing Magnus for a second and he is so flushed that he is now looking like a tomato.The moment he turns his head and sees Simon, his expression changes from _i am about to get laid_ to _i will kill you now_. He gracefully disentangles himself from Magnus and when the warlock turns around, his eyes are catlike and very much murderous.  
“Seldom. what.are.you.doing.” his words are punctuated and he is out of breath (probably because all the kissing and groping. or he is just really mad.)

“Nothing!! I heard a noise…and i thought it was an attack! But it isn’t, unless we count those hickeys, cause damn son, you look like you lost a fight with a bat, but anyway! you’re good, all is good, i’m going to leave you now…” he does a vague gesture with his hands and mutters “continue”, like the looser he is. Why couldn’t vampirism end his nervous babbling?

“I will kill him. I swear to god i’ll kill him.” Alec doesn’t even blink and Simon totally believes the threat is real. Blue balls are a powerful thing.

“I am not cleaning his ashes, darling. Let’s keep it civilized.” He starts breathing with relief when Magnus speaks again, “I’ll just turn him into a rat. Quiet animals, mostly live inside walls, don’t cockblock their roommates…”

“I’m sorry!” His voice cracks, and he wishes he never got up. Next time he’ll take his chances and be quietly murdered by Valentine’s goons (or Rafael, that knows that he is with Magnus, and is a little bit… annoyed at the moment).

Here’s the thing: Magnus has been nothing but accommodating, always making sure he has blood and his own space, and when they are both in the same vicinity, he makes an effort to actually listen to what Simon is saying. Naturally, he feels extra guilty to stop this make out session, because he knows how much Magnus wants to be all up in this particular shadowhunter, and how tense things have been since Jace’s Houdini act.

Something crosses Magnus face and he signs. “It’s okay, I know you didn’t do it on purpose. Just… go. Somewhere that is not here. For a couple of hours.” His eyes are still unglamoured and he is conveniently hiding his lap from Simon, but he doesn't look so outraged anymore. Alec’s expression continues impassive. Oh to be young and horny.

“Yes! Don’t worry, i'll be gone, like now. Be safe. And by that i mean from crazy shadowhunter people with circle runes and STD’s. Condoms are important, I once saw a buzzfeed video of a guy-” something hits him the head and he doesn't get to finish his totally fascinating story about inflamed balls.

“Ok, bye!” he rushes to his room and gets dressed in record time. He’ll have breakfast with Luke. As he starts climbing his window (getting to the door is an impossible task right now) he hears a strangled moan and decides that maybe he should just give sleep somewhere else for a couple of days.

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: marieruby.tumblr.com  
> title by Alicia keys, it was the soundtrack.


End file.
